My Practically Perfect Life

Once upon a time there were 2 men lost in a forrest. They happened across each other and shared they were lost. One man said to the other “let’s go together” and the second man asked why that would be a good idea. The first man said “so I can show you the wrong way and you can show me the wrong way. Together we can find the right way.”

I might have heard part of that one day in passing, and then made up the rest. But it makes sense. I think so often in life we come across people that have gone through things similar to our own trials and think “why would I ask them for help if they made the same mistakes I did?” Well, because even though they may have found themeselves in the same woods as you their path was totally different. No two situations can be exact. It is possible they can be very similar but because everyone is human there will be different story lines and outcomes. So I think finding someone that has gone through the same type of situations is the perfect person to talk to about yours.

I spent many years of my life, in different scenarios, not talking to anyone about my struggles. Either because I was ashamed or because I didn’t think anyone would understand. But I am here to tell you that I made a mistake having that mentality! There are so many more people in the world that have gone through parallel situations. And even if their story differs from yours more than you like they can still have a different outlook on the whole thing. It took me a long time to realize I can open up to people and not be embarassed at the cards I was dealt. Nobody’s life is perfect or without some bit of trauama or wounding. And I would be willing to bet there are far more people out there that think they need to keep everything to themselves than those that are willing or trying to talk about things.

I have somehow always been a person that people come to. With anything. This is not a complaint! I sometimes scratch my head and wonder what made them decide to tell me so much, but I will never be annoyed or upset about it. Let me clarify, I am not talking about just friends or acquatances, I am talking about total strangers too! It would be impossible for me to count the number of times a total stranger has come to me and started talking. That talking leads to me knowing much of their life story, or their current situation. And 97% of the time I have a response for them. Sometimes it is just that I am sorry. Sometimes it is that I will pray for them. And sometimes it is me opening up and telling them how something close to their story has happened to me. I have become friends with some of these strangers and even asked a few why they felt the urge to open up to me. Every time I have been told that they just feel a certain pull towards me or a strange wave of comfortability and before they knew it they were spewing out their secrets. I absolutely love this. I know there are times I can have RBF, and there are plenty of times I look upset, or confused, or sleepy…sometimes all at the same time! But having something about me that makes complete strangers feel comfort in talking to me, well that is one of the biggest compliments I believe I can get.

That took a little left turn…sorry! My point in all of that though is that sometimes you just need to word vomit. You need to get all of the stuff out of your head or you will feel like you will explode. I do this sometimes with writing. Or calling my bestie or whatever I feel compelled to do at the time to get the crazy out of my head. And it helps. Even if you don’t get an answer to your quandary, the act of voicing your thoughts can be extremely theraputic. You can sometimes come up with a conclusion yourself just by talking it out. But being able to confide in someone is so special. Sharing a part of you with someone, or being the recipient of the trust you give in expressing yourself is a treasure.

In conclusion (sometimes I never know how to go from one thought to another so I will just throw in things that sound more profound rather than a simple “and then” because then I will say “and then and then and then” and if you don’t get the reference please call me) there is never a reason good enough to feel you cannot confide in someone. That asking for help or guidance isn’t a good idea. If you’re worried about being judged then come see me because I promise you won’t get any judgment from me!

“If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together” -TWD

“Ask for help, not because you are weak but because you want to remain strong”

“When someone is walking beside us, we have more courage to walk into the unknown and to risk the dark and messy places of our journey” -Henry Kinsey-House