My Practically Perfect Life

Growing up, there were always stories, fairy tales and such about guardian angels. An angel that is assigned to you. To protect you and help guide you through life, or the hardships you are going through. I truly believe God and an angel were protecting me in 2010 when I flipped my truck. And before that, when I was physically beaten by someone that should have been protecting me. I know that angels were with my children so many times in their lives. It’s easy to say and believe when something big and scary happens. But what about everyday life? When it isn’t so dramatic, but you still aren’t “surviving” the way you are intended. What about the angels that are put in your lives then?

I had no idea, never thought about it until it was too late, but I believe that I had a guardian angel in my life. The sweetest soul that loved me no matter what. That brought me so much joy, and gave me the strength to get up when I truly did not want to. And yes, I am talking about a dog. But not just any dog. Badger was more than just a pup. He was so smart, and funny and he knew how much I needed him.

When I first met Badger almost 11 months ago, I thought he was the cutest little dog! But it wasn’t time for him to be in my life full-time. Not for another 6 months or so. But once it was time, we both knew. He became my best friend. My cuddle buddy, my smiles so many times that I could not bring one out by myself. He was so much more than a dog. He had my heart, and he protected me in so many ways. He made sure the people at drive-thru windows knew he was the boss! He kept people off our property that he didn’t want there! He watched me cook every meal to make sure I knew what I was doing…and to make sure if I dropped something, he would help pick it up! He was my baby, and I spoiled him! And I am so glad that I did. I wish I had carried him around a little more.

I have had pets in the past. A cat when I was a child, dogs throughout the years. And I have cared for them all. Different circumstances led to them not being in my life for a long time, but each of them were special to me. My girls, Phoebie and Piper, who live with my friends in Brenham, both hold a very special place in my heart. While I was living with them off and on, they always knew when I needed them closer to me. Or when I needed a nap!! I have met so many precious dogs over time that I instantly had a connection with. And that while I may not see them anymore, I still think of them often. Animals are so precious in the way they can sense your needs and just…be there for you.

But no other animal that crossed my path has ever touched me like Badger. We had our own way of communicating. He gave the best hugs and I could always count on feeling him cuddle next to me as he slept, even when he was held shortly by someone else, he always came back to me. So why am I writing this about my sweet Badger? Well, yesterday he was taken from this life and moved on to the next one. I have lived through so many awful things, but what I experienced yesterday truly broke my heart. I am not comparing my loss of Badger to the losses anyone else has experienced, human or pet. I am not even comparing the loss of his life to others that I have lost. But when 2 souls are intertwined like his and mine were, it was a physical and extremely emotional experience to hold him after the accident.

I can cry and continually think of what I could have done differently, but I know there is no sense in blaming myself or anyone else. It was an accident, and I could not have changed it. So instead, I have been praying and reflecting on the impact that he made in my life. And I have come to the conclusion that he was put in my life to protect me. And that he did. It won’t be easy going on without him, it’s been less than 24 hours, and it feels like it happened 2 hours ago. But rather than be angry about it, I choose to see what he did for me. And I choose to do what I can to make him proud.

Rest in Peace my sweet boy. Our world is better because we had you in it.